Whining, Wine-ing & Winning

Daily writing prompt

What’s a moment that made you realize you were stronger than you thought?

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I don’t think strength always shows up in one big life-changing moment. It usually happens in threes. Sometimes it’s a long stretch of years where life keeps knocking you down, and somehow you keep getting back up anyway. Or, in the wise words of Chumbawamba…“I get knocked down, but I get up again.”

For me, it started with my ectopic pregnancy.
That kind of loss changes you physically and emotionally in ways that are hard to explain unless you’ve lived it. It was painful, scary, heartbreaking, and one of the first times in my life where I realized I couldn’t control everything no matter how badly I wanted to.

Not long after that came my separation and divorce.
It wasn’t ugly or fueled by hate. We both realized we would be better apart than together, and as painful as that was to admit, it was the right thing for our family and especially for our son. Sometimes loving people also means being honest enough to let go of what no longer works.

Right in the middle of all of that, we lost a sister, a cousin, a family member who was taken from us far too young and far too quickly. Losing her during one of the hardest periods of my life felt unbearable at times. Grief has a way of making everything heavier. There were days I didn’t know how I was carrying all of it at once.

Then came the final divorce papers, the reality of starting over, and figuring out who I even was outside of the life I thought I’d always have. Somehow…little by little…I did, I dusted myself off and I rebuilt my life. I found peace where I thought there would only be pain. My ex-husband and I remained friends and built a healthy co-parenting relationship for our son. I’m even close with his wife, which I know probably sounds unusual to some people, but our family is filled with love and no regrets.

When I least expected it, life surprised me again in the best way. I found love, got remarried, and became a mom all over again at 41 years old. Now my life is loud toddler toys, coffee, messy dance classes, late-night cuddles, and stepping on Legos or tiny toys that trigger profane outbursts. Looking back, I think the moment I realized I was stronger than I thought was when I survived all of those chapters without letting them break me. I still believe in love. I still believe in family. And I kept going, even during the moments I thought I couldn’t.